Example of a Common App essay
The Common Application, or Common App, refers to the platform used to apply to (primarily) U.S. colleges. This allows candidates to write a single set of college application essays, rather than having to apply to individual colleges directly. This is an invaluable time and expense-saving tool that allows students to apply to multiple colleges at the same time. However, this also means that the primary focus of admissions officers around the U.S. is on the all-important Common App essay.
There is a strict upper word limit of 650 words for the Common App essay, and this means that every word of the essay needs to be carefully chosen by the candidate. Unlike with the UCAS personal statement, there are a number of prompts that candidates can choose from, and the Common Application can change them (although they have remained consistent for the last two years). However, the prompts are all designed with the same purpose: to introduce the U.S. college admissions officers to the candidate as a whole person. Students are tasked with presenting U.S. admissions officers with a clear narrative on their Common App essay, one designed to showcase their motivations, rhetorical skills, and accomplishments thus far. As such, it’s a challenge for any one, and best illustrated by looking at previous candidates’ examples of expository writing.
Here is an anonymised excerpt from a candidate’s Common App essay:
When I was thirteen years old, I took a trip to the Philippines. I left the high-rises of Hong Kong behind and visited a rural village outside of Cebu. I had never seen that scale of poverty before! The village houses were made with slabs of wood nailed together and leaves were layered on top as roofing. While such impoverished conditions could have left me feeling dejected, I was in awe of the incredible kindness and resilience of the people. The older villagers took time from their day to teach me how to make Pandesal, a local bread, as well as how to harvest rice. The children taught me the “Tinkling”, a Philippine dance with bamboo poles. In turn, I taught them children’s songs that I grew up with. What proved most difficult for me during the week was not the labor I undertook but the emotions that overwhelmed me when I saw those village children.
There’s some good work here in the above exemplar. The anecdote about leaving one’s comfort zone and privilege to engage with the wider world is compelling, and the descriptions of the houses are well-crafted.
On the other hand, there are some key issues in this Common App essay excerpt. For example, the student’s register varies–at times, they are appropriately formal, but it can veer into something too familiar, such as using an exclamation mark. These seemingly minor choices will affect the way the candidate is perceived by the college admissions officers. It could give the impression that the candidate did not take their experience that seriously, and actually have the effect of reinforcing their privilege rather than showing them making an admirable effort to expand their horizons.
The best structure for personal writing of the type expected on the Common App essay is to discuss the anecdote, but then move on to how it has affected you in the long term. In this candidate’s case, it would be great to see them discuss how they were changed as a result of their trip, thus demonstrating their personal growth. This is an important part of crafting a compelling Common App essay.
The Common App, and particularly the essay, can be challenging, especially as students are tasked with completing it on top of their usual schoolwork. It requires students to build skills in crafting personal narratives, and building a compelling profile that will support their application. As such, students find the support offered by BartyED’s team of expert U.S. college admissions tutors to be invaluable. Our team has extensive experience in guiding students through the entire Common App process, from building skills in writing personal essays, to selecting the best suited colleges in the U.S. and drafting the essays. BartyED offers comprehensive support throughout the year.
If you or your child is interested in attending college in the United States and wishes for expert guidance through the Common App process and beyond, reach out to us today by phone at +852 2882 1017 or email at enquiries@bartyed.com.